Since Hot Cute Fun Guy introduced me to this hilarious place, I have had silicone on the brain. Which subsequently reminded me of a favorite post from June, 2006. Enjoy!
Like many other little girls, I had a Barbie doll.
She was of course blonde with those unnatural, scary measurements.
Designed by a man I’m sure. Why are [...]
Celebrity jobs I would never EVER want:
Etiquette coach for Paris Hilton
Gah! Can you imagine? At least there would be lifetime job security.
Nicole Ritchie’s cook.
Talk about the most frustrating job in the world! Plenty of great leftovers though I’m sure.
Melanie Griffith’s plastic surgeon
If she looks this bad now, imagine her in another 10 years. Now [...]
What they say and what they mean:
“I’m thrilled to be performing for your audience on Christmas Day.”
Yea, I love getting up at 4 a.m. for hair and make-up on freaking Christmas to sing for a bunch of losers who will actually be watching morning tv. The things I do for my career. F*ck! My publicist [...]
I’m taking this Mel Gibson situation way too personally. To briefly recap, he got arrested for speeding up Pacific Coast Highway, was drunk and abusive when the officers pulled him over, and then spewed anti-Semitic diatribes. Quite a night’s work. This blogger and this one wrote about the situation quite eloquently, check them out.
Mel Gibson [...]
Like many other little girls, I had a Barbie doll.
She was of course blonde with those unnatural, scary measurements.
Designed by a man I’m sure. Why are so many of my childhood memories dictated by clueless men? Another post for another time. Anyway, I never had a Ken, I thought he was a total wuss. He [...]
What they say and what they mean:
“I’m just happy to be nominated.”
I’m going to crawl over ground glass to make sure that no-talent skank doesn’t beat me for the Oscar.
“I’m young and I just like to have fun.”
I sleep with everything that walks, and there is no substance I won’t swallow, sniff or shoot up.
“Of [...]